remembering

Sitting at my desk, on a muggy Thursday morning, I looked outside and saw fog. The fog reminded me of something, but what was it? It reminded me of dust.

Then I got an e-mail from a friend, titled "7 years ago"; it was a message of simplicity. Nothing but a few photos put into power-point form; but these photos hit me pretty hard and made me remember what day it was 7 years ago. The photos were of 09/11/2001. The attack on my homeland.

There was a lot of dust created by that attack. Right now, I seems like God is making a point... like I was supposed to remember the attack in a particular way. It feels odd.

Oh well, maybe we will be given another chance.

That's right. I pulled out of the AECs. I feel like it is the right choice, seeing as Flag still feels icky.

This is just so people know, if they read this, that my exciting news (qualifying for AECs, period) of a while ago is now dead.

Flag is sick.

We might miss the American Eventing Champoinships.

This sucks.

I hope he gets better.

When?

Why must I wait until I am an old person to have freedom?

It seems like I can have zero freedom and be happy with that and therefore cutting out my family, or have total freedom and have to live completely cut off from my family. There is not in between.

I can do what I want when they say I can, I have to do what they say when they say to do it... I can't grow up and become my own person simply because it is an inconvenience.

I hate this. GHAAAAAAAA!

When will I be allowed to grow up and experience life as a more normal 22 year old and not have to hang on their every wish. I want to be myself!!!!!!!

Sorry for the rant... I need to get it off the chest though.